Compartmentalization is the idea that a person can keep conflicting ideas, values even personalities in their lives simultaneously. They have a personality at home that is wildly different from their personality at the workplace. With their close friends they are warm and generous, in business they are ruthless.
This might initially seem like an advantage, to have different personalities or values based on the context that you’re operating in, and some leaders have been able to achieve high levels of success while demonstrating compartmentalization (JFK was allegedly incredibly compartmentalized, warm and engaged with his family, a philanderer when they were not there, and a ruthless empire builder in office – but history has not been kind to him, especially as related to his activities destabilizing in Latin America) the general trend is that it ultimately leads to self-destruction. This idea was seen in a simplified (but not less profound) manner in the short story The Strange Case of Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde (Robert Lewis Stevenson) – where the two personalities are split – Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde are given their separate domains – one public (Dr. Jekyll) and one private (Mr Hyde). The ultimate result was the self-destruction of both personalities.
The Expat is especially at risk at developing a compartmentalized life, as they often live in two worlds. One life is often affluent, globe-trotting, privileged, educated, awash in the values and mores of the West. Ideals of individualism, self-realization and individual material prosperity are prevalent.
If, however, they start to integrate into their host culture, they begin to find their values and norms challenged. The majority-world is not as affluent as the West, four out of five people have never been on an airplane, privilege is a birth-right, not earned, education and intelligence are disconnected, and the community takes precedent over the rights of the individual.
This can move the expat into a place where compartmentalization seems not just preferred, but it seems needed to maintain sanity. Humans are creatures that need to be anchored in culture and community, the question arises where will the primary identity be established – and is it possible, or desirable, to have a hybrid identity that shares the values of both East and West? Or is being able to switch quickly between identities the ideal? I’ve seen people racked with guilt trying to live two separate lives, and unable to fully enjoy either group.
Language seems to exasperate the inclination to compartmentalize, and seasoned expats have noted that people have different personalities in different languages. I’ve noticed the same thing in my own life, but am not sure how much of that is based on perceived cultural roles. Linguistic culture also seems to play a role in personality and willingness to take risks.
The reality is that we’re much more influenced by our environment than we’d ever like to admit. A positive, supportive environment that encourages risk taking and learning results in people who are creative, adventurous and innovative, whereas a high-stress environment results in people who are primarily focused on playing defense in their lives, and are committed to not messing up. That environment nearly eliminates creativity and risk-taking.
So what is the expat to do? How do they stay sane, but not become compartmentalized? How do you thrive in two worlds that seem to have conflicting, even incompatible values?
A few ideas, but note that these are ideas only as I’m still figuring this out for myself:
To Avoid Expat Compartmentalization:
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Become a Student of Your Home Culture – What does it mean to be British? What does it mean to be a mid-western, middle-class American? What is prioritized, and what is distained? Every culture has a list of unspoken rules and expectations, and the more we’re aware that these are preferences the more accepting we will be of others when they act outside of those norms.
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Become a Student of Your Host Culture – Read, ask questions, be a learner and risk being a fool. Cultures often make total sense when you dig into them, and find out why they behave in ways that are often contrary to the expectations of Westerners. Again, seeing right and wrong in terms of culture often becomes more of a difference of preference rather than a difference of morality.
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Define Your True Non-Negotiables – You need to have a category for morality and right and wrong, and you need to know where you stand in this matter. Morality is not culturally-based, it exists outside of culture, and consequently you can’t compromise in your moral stance. You do need to adjust what falls into your category of moral and non-moral issues. “Honesty” and “politeness” can be either moral or non-moral issues depending on your context. Oppression, violence, indifference and hatred are all expressed differently in different cultures, however the moral significance is still present. Know your morals, where you can be flexible, and where you absolutely cannot.
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Develop Strong Boundaries – If you want to be the same person regardless of context, you will need to have a strong sense of boundaries and a strong sense of self. This will mean often disappointing people, or even frustrating them. This becomes especially evident in areas of relational expectation where Western and Eastern expectations differ greatly. Having a strong boundary means that you’re able to be generous and engaged and friendly, but also know where you need to draw a line. Violating your own personal boundaries will result in compartmentalization or bitterness in relationships.
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Embrace Culture, Avoid Accidental Acculturation – Learn all you can about a new culture, but don’t thoughtlessly embrace the cultural norms. Every culture has its strong points, and those should be celebrated, but also they have their dark sides, and you should be aware of those as well. The more you can embrace a culture, the more you’ll be able to enjoy the people and your experience, but you should also know that as an expat, you’re always an outsider, and will always be a little odd. Knowing that means you’ll develop a bit of a resignation that you’re going to seem odd to those around you, and that can be a bad odd (wearing shoes in the house which is quite rude in many parts of the world) or a good odd (treating those who have a lower social status with respect and generosity). Accidental acculturation would be when you start to imitate those around you without an awareness of whether that imitation is a positive or negative influence. Sometimes it is harmless, but sometimes not, and can result in violation of your moral positions, communicate unintended messages or cause conflict with other cultural groups (potentially even your own!).
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Pursue Relationships and Integrity Relentlessly – The idea of integrity is always being the same person. Relationships are, well, relationships. As author C.S. Lewis put it – integrity is who you are when no one’s watching – and the hope is to be the same person, regardless of who you’re interacting with, and regardless of what environment you’re working in. Integrity in your close relationships, your inner-life and your interactions with your community are essential in helping fight against compartmentalization, and maintaining emotional and relational wholeness. The relentless pursuit of an ever-deepening integrity protects you from the Jekyll / Hyde bifurcation, and helps guard against compartmentalization. It isn’t as easy as compartmentalization, but it is essential to thriving as an individual whether you’re an expat or living in your home culture.
Pursuing relationships persistently means that you’re willing to work through the communication difficulties and the missteps of building relationships in new cultures, but it also means keeping solid relationships in your expat world – people who know you and who you feel you can be open with. Often it is easy to pursue one culture at the expense of the other, and the new expat must be careful to avoid joining an exclusively expat community if they want to have any hope of really learning the local culture and having local friends. Having a foot in both worlds is often difficult, but in the long run it is important to keep yourself as a whole person.